And the Journey Begins

I've been in the Philippines for about 3 weeks now, and the transition has been bumpy. There have been things that I really like about the Philippines, and things that I really dislike (like anywhere in the world, I guess). A few examples- Dislikes: the thick air pollution (my lungs aren't too pleased); the noise (it’s everywhere! roosters crowing in the morning, dogs barking at night, the loud music of neighbors, horns blaring); the mosquitos (self-explanatory...they like to nom on me at night). Likes: the kindness of the people; the excitement and novelty of crazy public transportation; learning Tagalog; overall lower cost of living; different flavors like pandan and ube.

Jeepney party (aka typical traffic)

For the first two weeks of my time in the Philippines, I was living in three separate places as my host family situation was being worked out; I stayed at the home of the MATUL director here, and the homes of two other APU MATUL students who are in their second year of the program. Although it was a little nerve-wracking not knowing where I was going to live and when, it was really a blessing being able to be eased into the culture and environment before immediately moving into my community.

About a week ago I moved into a community called Talayan in Quezon City (one of the cities in Metro Manila). I live with a really kind and beautiful family of four- Ate Elna, Kuya Roger, and their 2 daughters Patricia and Mika. It's kind of nice to have two younger sisters, although they are a bit shy since they don't speak very much English. The home is really small, with one tiny bedroom and a living area that’s also used as a dining area and sleeping area; it’s been hard for my introverted self to not really have any personal space, but space is limited in urban poor communities, and I knew coming into the program that it wouldn’t be easy. On a side note, I'm grateful that the home is on the 3rd story as the area floods really badly during the rainy season. I think I'm a little nervous about having to wade through flooded waters to get places, but I think it'll be kind of exciting in a way? I remember one of the women who was involved in the search for a good host family for me said that the area would be good for me so I could experience the floods. I think it'll be good for me too, as crazy as that sounds. I'll be able to have a better understanding of some of the difficulties many people have to experience on an annual basis by living through it myself.

Bagong pamilya! ("New family!")

I really love my Tagalog language lessons! I'll be taking them about 4 days a week, and each lesson is about 2 hours. The language school, His Name, is geared towards missionaries and all the teachers are really kind and fun. It feels really good being able to communicate with a bit more ease as I learn more words and phrases. I also feel like a small child as I can barely say anything and am taught songs in order to help me learn numbers and basic words. In regards to my online Azusa Pacific courses, it’s been difficult. Internet connection isn’t always that great here, and it’s easy to get distracted when class is not face-to-face, but through a computer screen. It’s just not quite the same in my opinion. I’m taking two classes, Urban Reality and Theology, and Language and Culture I. It's been pretty hard to focus at home and get schoolwork done with all the noise and lack of space, so I have a feeling that I will become good friends with some of the baristas at the local coffee shops when final papers are due...

view from my new home

Physically and emotionally, it’s been challenging thus far. As I am stretched and pulled out of my comfort zone by the things that are unfamiliar and difficult, I have to remind myself that God is my sustainer, and that everything's going to be okay. There is purpose in my being here. A devotional I read the other day by John Piper was about "The Battle to Remind" and I found it really encouraging:

"One of the great enemies of hope is forgetting God’s promises...Without reminding ourselves of the greatness and grace and power and wisdom of God, we sink into brutish pessimism." 

I've had some particularly rough days, but I know that things will get easier (and some things will get harder). I strive to focus on the positive and to find joy in the small things. One important example, I haven't gotten sick or had any stomach troubles from the food or water yet! Praise God. (: Finding joy in the everyday isn't always the easiest, but it reminds me to be grateful for today, as simple as that may seem. How can I dwell on the negative when I've been blessed with so much goodness?

Thank you all for your prayers & love & concerns for my well-being. <3

Winter Break & Pre-departure Preparations

Packing my life into a suitcase

The day has finally arrived. I leave for the Philippines today! The month that I've been at home since the semester has ended has been short, yet long. I can't believe the 4 weeks at home flew by so fast; it's been a really great time of rest and preparation (getting shots, packing, etc.), yet I feel that the longer I've been at home, the more anxious I've gotten about leaving as I think about all the hard experiences that are yet to come. I'm definitely a planner by nature, and when I'm not able to have this sense of control of my life and know what to expect in the future, it makes me really anxious. I think that's the beauty of God's timing though. He prepares the way for us and knows what we need much better than what we think we do. God orchestrates our lives in order to draw us closer to Him through particular people, places, and events. We just have to be still and listen.

I'll admit that there have been a lot of pretty sleepless nights lately as I think about what the next 19-20 months will be like. There are so many unknowns that I will encounter, never having been to the Philippines before. Where will I be living and with whom? What will be especially difficult for me? How will I handle being homesick?

I find Paul's words in 2 Timothy 1:7 really comforting-
For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control. I understand that fear is a pretty natural human feeling before experiencing new/hard things, but does my fear indicate that I doubt God's ability to provide for me? Do I not trust Him with this calling? It's likely that 2014 will be the hardest year of my life to date, but I trust that as I serve God in hard places and encounter a variety of challenges and obstacles, there will be sanctification and growth, as I too am molded in the process. In my head, it does seem pretty great...serve God and grow in faith at the same. Win-win, yes?

I want to say thank you to everyone who has spent time with me this last month (in person or not), listened to me as I shared my fears, taken me out for delicious things (I think too many delicious things :P) and supported me in prayer and/or financially.I'm also so grateful for the numerous people who I haven't even met yet who have been involved in preparations for me to go to Manila, praying for me and working out logistical things. I am so, so blessed to be loved by so many wonderful people.

Some prayer requests as I travel and move to a new home: discernment for my future host family (it's still being decided), patience as I learn how to live in a new place and culture and speak a new language, general safety & health, and peace that God would make the Philippines feel like home in due time. Thank you <3

I am so grateful that I serve a God who strengthens and empowers. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 2Cor 12:9